"Young People Need Friends, Not Rules."

I can't the original source for the quote I've pasted below, but I received it as part of the Prayer Alert e-bulletin from the Prayer Forum of the British Isles & Ireland. It's from the Baptist Union though, and the article was entitled, "Young People Need Friends, Not Rules".

"A diet of 'Bible stories and rules to follow' is not preparing youngsters to deal adequately with the dilemmas of the real world and that's why many are leaving the Church. Churches not being outward-looking communities and a general lack of care once they had left the youth group were also cited as reasons for the departures. Instead churches should be looking at being inclusive communities for all, ensuring that all are cared for uniquely and where young people are given space to grow and question without fear of failure. These were some of the key findings of the Baptist Union of Great Britain's Younger Leaders' Forum, which met at King's Park Conference Centre, Northampton last weekend. 'Many people I spoke to said Church had not prepared them for the real world,' said Mr Eddison, YLF member from Yorkshire. 'They needed help in coming to moral choices, rather than being told what the answer is.’"

"not preparing young people for the real world..."

"lack of care..."

"lack of space to grow and question without the fear of failure..."

"lack of help in coming to their own moral choices, rather than being told what the answer is..."

Are we still missing the point so badly?

Youth work that concentrates on 'tackling sin', on telling young people what not to do, on en-culturing (brain-washing?) them into the adult church... it's all doomed to failure. (Or maybe something worse than failure?) They will leave the church as soon as they reach the upper end of the 'youth work' age-range, as soon as they hit one of life's Big Issues and find their faith is dependent on a list of fragile (and sometimes non-sensical) rules, or an energetic (and probably over-worked) youth leader.

Young people need to be welcomed into the body of Christ. They need to encounter Christ in their clothes. They need to discover, and be part of the formation of "church in a new place", to quote Vincent Donovan's wonderful 'Christianity Rediscovered'. They need the space to make mistakes without being slammed and judged and written-off for it (as they are in almost every other arena of life). They need to be set up to succeed, to grow, to learn and mature, not set up to fail. They need space to express their uniquenesses, their gifts and talents, to express their emerging faith in authentic ways. (And perhaps we're talking about something a bit deeper here than some DJ decks and flash-lights and rapped-preaches and big events?) They need a hospitable, grace-filled space to draw close to Jesus and become more like him... to receive his Spirit, the Spirit of adoption, the seal of ownership, to discover that they are truly, deeply loved by God, and that they are part of God's incredible, evolving, unfolding Story. They need encouragement to change the world... because they can. *This* is what transforms lives, not a lengthy list of rules and regulations.

"Let the little children come to me," said Jesus. And beware to those who make it hard for them to come. I wonder about how hard we make it sometimes?

Comments

[Tim Sokell]

Really great Phil!

[Lindajoy]

can relate to this from my own personal journey! happily God had other plans...

[Ella]

Yes and Amen.

[E]

I totally agree. Saying that, one could take the word 'young' out if this article and it still makes a good point.

[Elspeth]

thanks so much for this! Lots of food fro thought and prayer!! EM, Aberdeen, Scotland

[Holly A]

Thats really good Phil! as a currently teenage person myself, youv got my brain pinned down on here! x